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Adjust. Adjust! Why can't I adjust to this new situation? Okay, sure, that was the way it was for the longest time, but that was then and this is now so just accept the fact that it's all different now and get over it! No, no, no! Don't cry! That's not helping at all! Sure, you're fine during the day, I guess, but at night? You and I both know that at night you can only do so much to stop those tears from flowing. "I loved him then and everything I loved about him is gone now, oh noooo--" Suck it up you big baby! Crying isn't going to make him the same again... But you have that promise! And besides, maybe you'll show him. Maybe... but no. You know that's not possible. Yeah, it'd be nice to be important for once; do something vital to the whole "operation" but you know it probably won't ever happen. Oh, but to feel helpful, if only just for a moment. I know it's stupid; you know it too. But I know you're going to keep on trying and keep hoping to just once be important to something big; be important to someone who you wish would acknowledge your feelings rather than push you away....
You're right, I'm getting just as... Eh... about it as you are. Sue me. At least I'm not getting all worked up about it. Yeah, yeah, I know that too. Completely oblivious. Someone else. Yada yada yada. It's the same old song and dance, though, isn't it? You know this! But I get what you mean... But... You've said it a million times, I know. Well, not a million--enough times that it should have been heard... If anyone was ever actually listening....
Yeah, that project! Work on it, show it to him, show him that you haven't forgotten how much he supported you, how much he helped you, how he made you feel... Sheesh, stop making me lose track of time! You're sitting there wallowing in sadness, depression, self-pity and hatred for not being able to convey your feelings, and you're making me take a lonely trip down "Memory Lane." Stop doing that!
What was I saying? ... The project. You remember it too, don't you? He remembered your first promise, he's sure to remember this, isn't he? I mean, the whole thing was his idea at first, right? He helped you tweak it and get all the details... Hurry up and do it! Show him that you haven't forgotten, that it still means as much to you as it did then! C'mon! Something! Anything!
You know it'll work. Come on, just... At least try! This isn't the you I knew! You were so persistant! Where did that girl go? Where is she now? She needs to hurry up and get her ass back here so you can stop being so... So pitiable! Get yourself together already!
Just try...
Try something already!
Shut up. ^^
NatalieLIVES Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2012
I've been there. Do what's best for yourself and if you really need to just let those tears fall.
catzrcute Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
^^; Thanks
xD It kinda feels like a self-addressed pep-talk that turned into mocking my cowardice....
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